But now my life has changed for ever. Since I found the Online Chapel, I have come to a profound new understanding of myself and it has awoken new insights into why I had lived my life the way I had. Not all of this is comfortable for me to talk about but I want to tell my story.
My name is Dave and before joining the Chapel, I was a computer salesman for a well-known chainstore. In my life before the Chapel I had little understanding of myself and this gave rise to behaviour for which to this day, two years later, I still do not feel I have even begun to atone.
My lack of faith and distance from God had made me bitter. I had no real friends, only the sympathy of undercover social workers pretending to think that I was funny. I was unaware of this, of course, and spent many years acting in a way that I find embarrasing even here in the non-judgemental environment of the Chapel.
When I first encountered the site, I was scornfull. When I went to bed that night, however, I found I could not sleep. I was plagued by visions of myself growing old and alone. That night was the longest of my life and when the dawn finally came I thought -
"I cannot bear to be myself a moment longer. My life has to change."
I sent ten pounds to the Chapel and immediately found that my sense of anger and inferiority had begun to lessen. I skipped home from a post box I had almost crawled to, so great was my hatred of what I had become.
Elated, I sent another twenty. By the time I got home, I could not help laughing. How free and light my life had become.
Several months later, after I had sent, in total, almost eight hundred pounds, two computers and my paper-based pornography collection, I recieved a mysterious call.
"More porn," said a voice and hung up.
I knew instantly that this was a sign and caught the next coach to the address that I had sent my stuff to. They welcomed me in immediatley and put me to work creating web-content for the site. They don't speak to me much and I've had to do some pretty awful things to earn my keep but I know, in my newly awakened heart, that their love for me is unparrelelled and that I have found my home.
