Technology

"Drink not the blood of oxen nor take the hooves for pleasure, lest you be with the Lord." (Sanctimony 19:23)

Project BX193 - "The Screaming Jesus"

The technical division of the Chapel is currently at work on project BX193, codenamed "The Screaming Jesus". This is an attempt to combine the death of Christ with his subsequent ascent into heaven by crucifying an action man then attaching D class engines to either end of the cross-pole.

As can bee seen from the plan, this is a highly technical undertaking and the aspect ratios need to be calculated with precision. Assuming an auspicious coefficient on the day, we have hopes of attaining heights of up to several feet and injuring unprecidented numbers of NASRA pad operatives.