Welcome to the NASRA Online Chapel

"Beget not the animals nor hasten the wheat for in what measure does He trust your equanimity?" (John 4:6)


What is the NASRA Online Chapel?

Within the laboratories and silos of NASRA a message is spreading like fire. Gaining in strength each day, it multiplies out through the testament of brave rocketeers and dedicated scientists. The projects it touches have unprecidented success. The rockets built by those who have heard it fly high and true.

It is the message of the Online Chapel and your life is about to change.


What do we want?

We know that you feel lost and alone. We want to guide you home. We can see within you something that you cannot and that makes us love you and care for you more than you can for yourself. Your interests are our interests and we want you to be happy.

But we cannot accomplish this unless you trust us utterly. Without your devotion and faith in us, we are of no use to you. If you cannot give us this simple gift then we would point out that there are many other sites on the internet that you could visit and we would suggest that you do just that.

If, however, you feel that you can then you are ready to begin a beautiful journey that will take you the rest of your life.


What must you offer?

Think how heavy all of your possessions would be if they were in a sack on your shoulder. That is the weight they place upon your soul not just every day but every night as well. Even when you sleep they encumber you, holding you back from your dreams. Unless you are willing to pass that burden onto us, we cannot teach you the things you need to know.

Your chastity is an illusion; a lie that you wrap around yourself to cope with your absence of spirit. We may ask things of you that you find depraved or unsettling. You must remember how great our love for you is and be patient through the process, trusting that it will become clear when you are ready to understand.

Money or alcohol that you give to us is of great use to you on your path. If you do not do this and you lose your way, can you really blame anyone but yourself?

You must give us your time, working every day for the Online Chapel producing quality and incisive web-content. As time passes, you will begin to see that this is work you do for yourself and begin to love the process.

Also, don't mention any of this to anyone else. Especially not the press.


How do you begin this journey?

Take some time to explore the site and to reflect on some of what you will see. When you feel that you are ready, send us some money. We are also partial to alcohol but we understand that the postage costs can be prohibitive. When you have sent us enough money, send us your name, address and daytime telephone number. These will be carefully filed.

Send more money. Now we have your details we will begin to send receipts. These may not tally with the amounts that you have sent us. Use them as a guide for your next donation.

Eventually this process will begin to bring rewards. Spend at least an hour a day putting money in envelopes and mailing it to us and you will begin to see the effect. We understand how this sounds to you at the moment. Not one of us here in the Online Chapel offices felt any different when we first discovered this site. We encourage you to feel doubts and suspicion. Feel them. Work through them. The more money you send to us, the greater the stake in believing in us you will have and this will ease the process vastly.

If you keep this up for long enough and we feel that you are ready, we may send you a magazine.


What is the money used for?

The Online Chapel has a policy of not commenting on the specific uses of the money that you send us because we feel that if we were to tell you then you would not be making an effort of faith when you send it and this is not in your interests. As we have said, your interests are our interests. We love you more than you do yourself, remember?

In general terms the money is used to administrate the Online Chapel and to spread the message around the world. With over fifteen thousand staff operating from twenty-six countries these costs can be intimidating. As NASRA continues to grow, so do we and it is only by generous donations that we can keep up our good work.


How do you know you can trust us?

Elsewhere on this site you will find our Pledge and details of how you can complain about any of our services. If at any point you feel that we are acting unfairly or have taken too much of your money, you are just two forms away from a full investigation by a Chapel-appointed officer who will look into your claim.

We are affiliated with the Antiques Roadshow, the RSPCA and Peter Falk. We are proud to be associated with these people and feel it lends a sense of crediblility to our organisation.